This is like a part 2 of my previous blog Between a Rock and a Hard Place. This is a deeper discussion of what God showed me about the dilemma of that hard place. It will never cease to amaze me at how God puts different little things together to paint a picture for you of what He is trying to do in your life. One line on it’s own wouldn’t be too impressive but when they all drop in your minds eye a whole story comes to life and answers fly out of hiding.
My girlfriend from California sent me a copy of a blog she’d just read thinking it would encourage me. It was perfect. One line answered what I was sitting here thinking about — Heed My words only and don’t divert to the right or the left of the path I have laid out before you. Listen for My voice saying to you, ‘This is the way, walk ye in it’.
I believe this path I am on is what the Lord has laid out before me. He told me over 5 years ago He was sending me to a safe place so it should be safe for my husband too since he is part of me. From the minute I came out here from the coast I have been working toward the job I have now. I have had no training or previous experience for any job I’ve had out here (4 in all) but each brought lessons in working with Aboriginal people on all levels. I believe God has me here to work with His beautiful brown people and I do love them, love working with them and hearing them sing is total spirit and blessing that brings tears even if it is in language where you can’t understand a word. You hear God’s voice and love in their songs.
So seek ye first the kingdom of God and the wealth of his righteousness. For wherever your treasure lies there will you find your heart. That line has been coming at me from all directions. For me the kingdom of God is here in these 3 communities where I work. My heart is with these people. I am only happy and at peace when I’m out here.
Going back to that one line I think of the part “Heed My words only and don’t divert …” My husband has been in and out of the hospital like a yoyo for nearly a year now. I have heard words from doctors, everyone I know and my husband’s kids (one is a doctor), suggesting every direction I should turn in regard to my job and where we live. But today I had one of his doctors from his hospital team call for a long talk about his future. He was totally positive about him coming out here to live with me in this community. He said if he takes the one medicine in particular correctly he should be good.
He understood my rock and a hard place and thought my husband being out here where I could keep an eye on him was the best answer. There is a clinic out here and doctors and they fly people to the hospital in town all the time when worse comes to worse.
Everything came together and I had an epiphany from God. I can’t keep my husband alive and well by quitting my job and sitting by his side while we starve and lose our house. Only God can keep him and I have to follow His path and leave him in God’ care. I have to make the choice and be content with it, always remembering that it is God, not me, who controls everything. He is our source for health and income. If He has put me out here on this job it isn’t just a way to make a living. More importantly it is a purpose He wants completed and I’m the one He has chosen. I can’t walk away from it or I would be walking away from the path He laid before me.
It is a strange thing but this community gives peace to people who come out here and allow it to flow. This is where over two years ago they were trying to kill each other in tribal feuding. I watched it on TV and thought wow, glad I’m not out there and yet God sent me here!
When I first took the remote housing job I never dreamed I’d end up out here in this community. Then things changed and in order to go to a permanent level and keep my job I had to put in for this community when the job came up. I had been out here with another worker a few months before and I felt no fear but I did feel the peace, which surprised me. I was only here for two days and I didn’t want to leave.
I believe the Christians in this community have made a place for the Holy Spirit through months of fervent prayer, crying out to God to heal their community and people and that is where the peace comes from.
God is so good and He never loses patience or gives up on us when we don’t hear His voice or understand what is so obvious after He puts a spotlight on it. He did tell us that following Him would keep us out of the dark and in the light.
John 8:12 (NKJV) Then Jesus spoke to them again, saying, “I am the light of the world. He who follows Me shall not walk in darkness, but have the light of life.”